Mental Health - COPING - Ten-Ways-to-Fight-your-Fears

Ten Ways to Fight your Fears

Whatever it is that scares you, here are 10 ways to help you cope with your fears and anxieties:

1. Take time out

It feels impossible to think clearly when you’re flooded with fear or anxiety. A racing heart, sweating palms and feeling panicky and confused are all the results of your body’s adrenalin. So, the first thing to do is take time out so you can physically calm down.

Distract yourself from the worry for 15 minutes by walking around the block, making a cup of tea or having a bath. When you’ve physically calmed down, you’ll feel better able to decide on the best way to cope.

2. What’s the worst that can happen?

When you're anxious about something, be it work, a relationship or an exam, it can help to think through what the worst end result could be. Even if a presentation, a call or a conversation goes horribly wrong, chances are that you will survive. Sometimes the worst that can happen is a panic attack.

If you start to get a faster heartbeat or sweating palms, the best thing is not to fight it. Stay where you are and simply feel the panic without trying to distract yourself. Place the palm of your hand on your stomach and breathe slowly and deeply (no more than 12 breaths a minute). This will help soothe the body back into a state of stable calm.

It may take up to an hour, but eventually the panic will go away on its own. The goal is to help the mind get used to coping with panic; taking the fear of fear away.

3. Expose yourself to the fear

Avoiding fears only makes them more scary. If you panic one day getting into a lift, it’s best to get back into a lift the next day. Stand in the lift and feel the fear until it goes away. Whatever your fear, if you face it, it should start to fade.

4. Welcome the worst

Each time fears are embraced, it makes them easier to cope with the next time they strike, until in the end they are no longer a problem. Try imagining the worst thing that can happen – perhaps it’s panicking and having a heart attack. Then try to think yourself into having a heart attack. It’s just not possible. The fear will run away the more you chase it.

5. Get real

Fears tend to be much worse than the reality. Often, people who have been attacked can’t help thinking they’re going to be attacked again every time they walk down a dark alley. But the chance that an attack will happen again is actually very low.

Similarly, people sometimes tell themselves they're a failure because they blush when they feel self-conscious. This then makes them more upset. But blushing in stressful situations is normal. By remembering this, the anxiety goes away.

6. Don’t expect perfection

Black-and-white perfectionist thinking such as, "If I’m not the best mum in the world, I’m a failure," or, "My DVDs aren’t all facing in the same direction, so my life is a mess," are unrealistic and only set us up for anxiety.

Life is full of stresses, yet many of us feel that our lives must be perfect. Bad days and setbacks will always happen, and it’s essential to remember that life is often complicated.

7. Visualise

Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine a place of safety and calm: it could be a picture of you walking on a beautiful beach, or snuggled up in bed with the cat next to you or a happy memory from childhood. Let the positive feelings soothe you until you feel more relaxed.

8. Talk about it

Sharing fears takes away a lot of their scariness. If you can’t talk to a partner, friend or family member, call a helpline. And if your fears aren’t going away, ask your GP for help. GPs can refer people for counselling, psychotherapy or online help through a new online service called Fear Fighter.

9. Go back to basics

A good sleep, a wholesome meal and a walk are often the best cures for anxiety. The easiest way to fall asleep when worries are spiralling through the mind can be to stop trying to nod off. Instead, try to stay awake.

Many people turn to alcohol or drugs to self-treat anxiety, with the idea that it will make them feel better, but such home-remedies only worsens nervousness. And eating well will make you feel great physically and mentally.

10. Reward yourself

Finally, give yourself a treat. When you’ve picked up that spider or made that call you’ve been dreading, reinforce your success by treating yourself to a candlelit bath, a massage, a country walk, a concert, a meal out, a book, a DVD or whatever little gift makes you happy.

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The Have I Got A Problem website is a free online resource to help people better understand any issues or concerns they may have about mental health or addiction. The website includes resources specifically focused to; general Mental Health, Depression, Stress, Anxiety, Insecurities, Self-harm Schizophrenia, Bipolar, Anger Management, Eating Disorders, Coping, general Addiction, Alcohol, Smoking, Gambling, Drugs, Cocaine, Heroin, Marijuana (Cannabis) Ecstasy, PCP, Mephedrone, Ketamine & Crystal Meth.

The site was created to give the public information to help them understand mental health and addiction issues and to assist people in making better informed decisions about their life and personal choices.

www.haveigotaproblem.com was created and is run by 'Advising Communities’, which is a UK registered charity (Charity No. 1061055)

Quotes

"As horrible as I felt, I knew other kids would go through this stuff too, and maybe my story could help them."

Chase

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Peter

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Emily

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Andrew

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Andrew

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Marge

"Time heals all wounds. After the initial emotions set in and you begin to deal with them, they become easier to manage."

Donna

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"Dealing with our daughter’s addiction was by far the most difficult and the most painful thing we have had to navigate together as a couple."

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"Neither one of us could believe that one of our kids, to whom we had devoted our adult lives, would have, or could have, headed off in this direction. We lived in denial for a long time."

Shelley

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"Then we snap out of our dream and see our child addicted to a drug and wonder if the future is even possible. We mourn the loss of our dream"

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"These dreams were ours. That is why the pain is so great. We feel our dream slipping away. It’s such a shame we have imposed our dream upon our child and we see their addiction as a failure to achieve our dream."

Brian

"My hopes and dreams now are that I can be a better father, and that I will be regarded by some little ones as the best grandpa in the world."

Brian

"When another person is the one who has “the problem,” and you are the one lifting every stone to find the solution to his or her problem, you cannot and will not find it."

Pamela

"All is far from hopeless, however. You can and you must find answers to your own problem."

Pamela

"There is a way out. Whatever first step you decide upon, take it today. You will not regret it."

Pamela

"I believe some of us are more determined to stay, some of us more likely to withdraw and that it isn’t necessarily the degree of strife that makes the difference"

Gina Sangster

"Every now and then we may find ourselves in a relationship that has just run its course."

Donna

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Marie Hartwell-Walker

"Sometimes it’s easier to talk to a stranger than to relatives or friends"

Jane

"During a very dark time a friend told me, “Where there is life, there is hope.” I don’t know if he knew how profound those words were to me."

Harriet

"Dealing with the pain and heart break is never easy. We just have to live the days as they are set out and not live in the past."

Albert

"Life isn't always the way it's suppose to be, it's just the way it is. The way we cope with it is what makes the difference."

Anonymous

"When in doubt just take the next small step."

Anonymous

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Louis

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Laura

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Henry

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Jasmine

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Julia

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Brenda

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Try volunteering

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Allow yourself to be less than perfect

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SLEEP!

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Get a pet

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Face your feelings

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Look after your physical health

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Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel, and don’t tell yourself how to feel either

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More Tips & Hints

Ten Ways to Fight your Fears

Downloads

Web Resources

Quotes

Tips & Hints

Set Expectations

Be resourceful

Have a good support system

Handle your emotions

Have a sense of humor

A Different Treatment?

Problem solve

Keep calm

Use humour

Be proud of surviving

Feeling totally burned out? Retreat in solitude for a while

When you're feeling down, or not yourself, listen to music

Learn to say

Face your difficulties

Go ahead and make mistakes

Call an old friend

Try volunteering

Allow yourself to be less than perfect

Socialize with positive people

SLEEP!

Get a pet

Turn to friends and family members

Face your feelings

Look after your physical health

Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel, and don’t tell yourself how to feel either

Plan ahead for grief “triggers”

Coping with separation/divorce

Give yourself a break

Don’t go through problems alone

After a breakup

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